Four Becomes Five: Find the ones that get you

Stick to them like hot glue

As the year draws to a close once more, it’s the perfect time to get all retrospective about it. How the last year has gone, what I’ve enjoyed, what I’ve not enjoyed, and just how things have changed, hopefully for the better. I’m currently laying in bed with a wicked case of acid reflux thanks to far too much Christmas food, so what better time to ramble?

To start, I have a habit of getting very emotional about,,, everything, and I’d say that’s both a positive and a negative. It’s funny looking back at last year’s retrospective, seeing what worked out and what didn’t.

The biggest positive is that the real life stuff has been moving forward, in fact I’m most of the way through my therapy appointments! My last one’s in January. I might have to go back someday, but for this run, I’ve completed it. Going to therapy and figuring some of that stuff out allowed me to successfully apply for a college course back in June, which I’m now working my way through, and enjoying it! It’s been really nice to feel like things are going somewhere again.

And artistically I feel I’ve been doing well, I’m happy with my art and progress. I’ve been trying to branch out and find my own identity with my art this year, drawing more of what I like rather than what I think people might want, and exploring more style-wise. It’s been real encouraging to have that support from my friends, and making stuff that’s fun to look at is always rewarding… Most of all this year I’m happy to finally have an art style that feels genuinely consistent without me having to try and force it. There’s not a whole lot to say there other than I hope to experiment more next year, and also raise my commission prices,,,

The growth in audience I’ve experienced this year has been incredible, and I’m very thankful for people’s support in my endeavours to draw many silly little animal people, and I’d be lying if I said it hadn’t been an extra encouragement to keep drawing and improving. It feels strange to talk about and I hate to feel like I’m boasting, but yeah, very glad people enjoy what I do,,,

As far as things that didn’t work out, it’s a little complicated. I am a sap. I am a total and utter sap. I’ll put far too much time and energy into people that absolutely do not deserve it, I’ll put aside my own comfort in favour of others, and I’ll be sickeningly polite throughout,, And that’s bitten me a couple times this year. To be called a “fake friend” for feeling frustrated over someone’s repeated nasty behaviour and reacting as such. I felt hurt. And it did hurt, because funnily enough, I did see them as friends. However they wish to see the situation, I did indeed see them as friends.

But it was a necessary experience, one that’s helped me recognise who’s actually there for me, who actually appreciates the work and time I put into things, and who’s actually fun to talk to. And one that allowed Somnolescent to be a comfortable enough place to be for others to feel at home there.

It’s wild to think that a good three quarters of the year have been after that point, because it really has flown by since then. Those first three months felt the same length as the last nine. I do really want to thank everyone kindly for their support, their patience, and all the fun times we’ve had so far. I am delighted to be calling again, to be sending each other gifts and cards, to just be goofing off with people instead of walking on eggshells.

And while I’ve absolutely had my issues this year, I do think things are getting better. I’d like to thank Cameron especially for all the patience and love he’s given me, I don’t know where I’d be without you. I look forward to spending more time with you, with all these things we love. I’ll leave the rambles for our DMs or perhaps a post on the 20th, but do remember I love you muchly.

All I can hope is that things continue this way, on the up! I hope everyone has a wonderful year ahead of comfort and success in whatever way you wish. With any luck it won’t be long at all until I finally get to meet Cameron in person, and who knows, I might get to see more of you guys too. I hope more of the cards show up at last,,

Happy new year!