Once again, as quickly as it arrived, another year heads off into the great unknown…
2025 was an interesting one, to say the least. With my birthday on the 29th, I have now passed the halfway point of my 20s, I’m 26! Which is a bizarre, unbelievable number to me. I’m closer now to 30 than 20. On some level I never anticipated getting this far, and it’s strange to think about whatever time might be ahead of me, and what I should do with it. I’m long removed from being a teenager now, and yet it feels as though no time has passed at all. I’m an adult, a fully-fledged adult, and I need to step out into the world. I mean, I’m long overdue, but I’m ignoring that…
As far as my personal life goes, outside of the rough patches, things are moving. I’m close to finishing my degree and I’m weighing out what I want to do next. Suggested to me by my tutor was a master’s degree up in Cambridge, which would be an interesting experience to say the least, if I did manage to get onto it. It would mean moving away from home for the first time in my life, for one thing. It’d also put me in a better place as far as reaching my career goals as a children’s book illustrator goes, which is supremely exciting and equally unreal. If I could make a living illustrating books, and potentially creating my own someday? I’d be so so happy.
It’s all still very surreal however, and not something a younger me would’ve ever guessed would be on the table. I don’t think I would’ve even felt deserving of it. Though with that thought, and with the end of the year being a time of reflection, it makes me think of how Somnol has been with me for such a large chunk of my life now, and such an important chunk too.
I’ll spare you the rambling biography, but in short, I met Cammy when I was 18 and he was newly 19, just two damaged kids searching for friendship. He invited me into the group, or what existed of it back then. Since then, Somnolescent has been there for me through so much! Through dropping out of college at 19, through the pandemic and my anxiety trapping me in my home, through therapy and trying college again at 22. All of this, all of the support and companionship, has helped me find myself where I am today. I came out of high school utterly crushed, unsure how long I’d go on for, and completely sure I’d never have friends again. Even when things have been rough in the group, I’ve always felt like I have at least someone on my side, and that means a whole lot to me.
Thinking about the passage of time again, we’re all so much older now than when we met, and time only moves forward! Sometimes that scares me, but at the same time I’m excited to see where we all end up, who we end up becoming. Change tends to be a gradual thing, sometimes so gradual that we don’t even notice it unless we look back on who we used to be and what we’ve accomplished since then. But change always exists in one form or another, and you’re all the kinds of people who choose your next move, rather than letting life choose for you. As such, I’m confident that you’ll all end up somewhere good in this world, somewhere comfortable. Let’s hope that such good things happen in the coming year.
This year was a troubled one for me, and at points has been nigh unbearable. But throughout all of that, Somnolescent has been a comfort to me, and an escape. The group reminds me that there’s always something good to look forward to, and that it’s alright to enjoy myself even when I’m not feeling like I’ve earned it. To just be silly and light-hearted with friends heals a lot of emotional wounds, and I absolutely want to do more stuff with folks in the new year.
Lads, I’m honoured to be your friend, and I know you’ll all do wonderful things, as you always have done. Here’s to many more years of Somnolescent!
Happy new year, everyone! Try not to drink too much… 😛
